Happy Mother's Day

The recent royal wedding has delighted my imagination throughout the spring. My family and I lived in London for 6 months in the fall of 1985. I remember everything, school, friends, the guinea pig that bit my hand, museums, the 'punks' with mohawks on King's Cross, castles, ruins and crown jewels. I have often thought that this visceral city experience as a child was the reason I longed to move to New York as a semi-adult.

I never had a royal sighting. But I do remember when a little girl in my first grade class was four hours late to school. When pressed as to why she said that her mother had taken her to see Diana's motorcade. To an American it seemed kind of silly to me. We don't have such a thing as royalty here. We do not think of any man as being somehow hanging between Godliness and earthliness. Yet here was Diana.

Since the royal wedding was announced some months ago I think I have clicked on every link Yahoo has posted to Diana and Charles's wedding photos. My own mother did not really look so much like Diana, but recently it occurred to me that the way she wore her hair was exactly the same. While I always attributed the style to my mother, it is likely that she was emulating Diana. She wore her hair like that for years, no…decades.

Today Diana reminds me of my own mother who was enamored of all things English. My mother drank coffee in the morning but always tea in the afternoon. I should note that my mother was not even one ounce English.

It was maybe the third or fourth weekend of my first year in college that Diana was killed. I went to church and the priest prayed for her and her family and I was sorely confused. When I returned to my dorm the first people were talking about it. I felt so deeply for her children. Yet it was only 26 months later that I would be just like her children, experiencing the loss of my own mother. And last week during William's most happy day, I admit I kept thinking how much it stunk to not have his mum there with him.

I still think of my mom every day and in many different ways. Now that I have my own children I see her so differently. If you have your mom, kiss her today. If you can't kiss her through the distance then talk to her and tell her you love her. And if you are fighting with your mom, just quit it. The path of pride is often lonely and never leads you where you want to go. If your mom is fighting with you then think of her and forgive her. We never know how many days we get to see the sunlight. Make them as beautiful as you can.

Happy Mother's Day everyone!

Eleven Years Today

Today I write a very special post. Today, on the eleventh day of the eleventh month, it is the eleventh anniversary of my mother's passing.

My mother was a beautiful contradiction. She was both confident and self conscious. She had a warm smile and was always very welcoming to all. Yet, as is common of the women on her side (including myself I am told), she had a snappish temper. Hell hath no fury like a Stoffel scorned. She was a strong willed, stubborn, confident, smart and utterly charming woman. And as each day passes the woman I greet in the mirror each morning is resembling her more.

I have mentioned before that my mother was something of junk food addict-remember when we called it junk food? Somewhere in the last 15 years we dropped the word junk.... She always made a mean homemade pie, and had a passion for creamed chipped beef, frito pie, tater tots and the like. She cooked every night but meals were simple, much like I make for my family today. But while she loved to eat I never really got the impression that she loved too cook. She had a rotating menu of about 12 dinners that she made over and over again. She did love to cook sweets. I remember making peanut butter cookies with her when I was about 6. As we ate the warm cookies straight from the oven she told me how they were her favorite. I asked why she didn't make them more often. And her response? She said she'd eat them all. And I think she did. Those cookies were gone in two days. And we made them maybe once or twice more, that was it.

My mother let me help in the kitchen, but mostly I would make cookies or something like that. I don't think she took my kitchen interest as anything more than childhood curiosity. I don't ever remember sitting on the counter while she cooked. But then again, I don't always invite my Things into the kitchen, because I just assume they'd rather watch Yo Gabba Gabba! I should stop assuming and reach out more before these years pass me by.

My mother was diagnosed with brain cancer in April of 1998. I was finishing up my freshman year in college. She fought the good fight for 19 months. But she was being called home, and you can only fight that so long. She bravely passed eleven years ago today, but I still see her every day because when my kids smile, their fat cheeks make their eyes close up. And that is always how I remember her, with a smile so large that she could hardly see.

So in honor of you Mom, I will celebrate with some frito pie, but hold that canned chili please.

My Special Chili

One Pound of Grass Fed Ground Beef

One Medium Onion

Two Cloves of Garlic

One 28 Ounce Can of Whole Peeled Tomatoes

Paprika
Garlic Powder

Cumin

Salt

Black Pepper

2 16 oz cans of beans, any kind will work, black, pinto, red, kidney, etc

Concentrated Bone Broth (optional)

There is no need to buy pre-blended chili powder unless you like the flavor. Add the ground beef to a dutch oven with a little olive oil (my grass fed beef is really lean). Brown the meat and then add the chopped onions and garlic. Cook until soft. Add the paprika and cumin, salt and black pepper. I would love to tell you how much to add. But the truth is I just add a little at a time until it tastes right. I would start with two tablespoons of paprika and one tablespoon of cumin and see what you need from there. You are probably comfortable doing salt and pepper to taste already. After the spices add the can of tomatoes. I break them up in my hands before adding them to the pot. Then adjust the spices and add the bone broth (which is really just homemade beef bouillon cubes), cover the chili and let it cook for at least 30 minutes. Add the beans and cook another 30 minutes or up to 2 hours.

On the day you plan to serve the chili, fill a large ramekin or baking dish about halfway full with chili. And layer on the corn bread batter. Cook at 425 degrees for 25-30 minutes or until the top is golden brown and puffed up.

Squash-Corn Bread

1/2 cup squash puree (I just took 6 orange ice cubes out of the freezer and thawed them)

1/2 cup cornmeal

1/2 cup half-white flour

1/2 teaspoon salt

2 eggs

1/2 cup milk

2 tablespoons melted butter

Combine the eggs, milk, butter and squash puree in a small bowl. In a larger bowl combine the flours and salt. Add the wet ingredients to the dry all at once. Mix thoroughly. And then continue placing batter on the chili. Hey, I am going to find room to squeeze that squash in there...

This post is part of Food Renegade's Fight Back Fridays